Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Insecurity and Scatterology

This is the first Wednesday in March and you know what that means - Insecure Writer's Support Group. As I look around the room I'm encouraged to see such a big turnout - I know - I should wish that no one would show up for that might indicate no one was insecure. But I know better - the fact that people can drag themselves to a meeting and stand up and write about how insecure they might be feeling is a good thing. Yes, it is.

Today I would like to fess up about my root insecurity. Ahem ... here I go ... my deep-down terrible fear is two-fold - one that I don't write well enough for anyone to care and two that there is a lot of excellent writing out there so why should I add to a pile (especially considering #1).  #3 problem is that I am hopeless at grammar - for instance I just spent a whack of time putting the last period in and out of the parenthesis. But let's not even go there - I can and do get help for that and try not to fuss. Now that I think of it, I also have a #4 - scatterology - the abiding love of being scattered - my interests ranging from home-grown mysteries to deep literary-type novels to creative non-fiction to plays to poetry to the essay. Also I like dogs, gardening, knitting, politics, reading, photography, meditating, grand-children and messing about in boats. Whenever I'm engaged in any of these passions I feel that they are the ONLY thing. But they aren't. 

Now I'd like to rebut some of what  I've just said. In response to #1 and #4 I have been writing as a solid practice for about 12 years - I always wrote before that but I wasn't so persistent with it. I am getting better. I'm also getting faster. And I think that my scatterology aids me in what I write - I have a rather broad knowledge of jobs, places, and passions because I've had many jobs, lived and travelled many places and been passionate about many things.

Thank you for listening. When I air my fears they dissipate somewhat. If you haven't already - take the link above to Alex Cavenaugh's site and find more of us insecure writers waxing on. That's what I'm going to do.

8 comments:

Natasha Hanova said...

Hi Jan! I'm so with you on #1 & #2. I think many writers share this fear. It shows that we care and that we are open to improvement.

It sounds like you have a solid foundation for writing with all of your life experiences. What more could a writer ask for?

Fellow IWSG member.

Elizabeth Spann Craig said...

It's funny because I was just thinking that your scatterology was perfect for a writer...then you acknowledged at the end of the post that you recognized that! What a wealth of texture you can include in your stories with your other interests!

Liza said...

I am awful at grammar and proofreading. The broader our experiences the better we write...and I for one think you are a lovely writer.

Anonymous said...

Jan - I think most of us think about all of the other work out there and compare it with our own writing. But truth is, each of us has a unique voice. So it doesn't matter what anyone else is doing.

Jan Morrison said...

Hi Natasha - thanks for dropping by. I agree - I think those first two are the crux of being insecure and really the second is only a flourish on the first.
Elizabeth - yes! But one must stop doing some of it so that one has time to get it down in writing!
Liza - that goes right to my heart coming from you!
Margot - the essential thing I need to remember! Comparing my insides with other's outsides! Thanks ...

Anonymous said...

I never feel like #2 (the more, the merrier! lol), but #1 is what gets me. When it attacks, I like to think to myself that only good writers worry about whether their writing is good enough. :)

Rachna Chhabria said...

Hi Jan, I am so with you. I too fear that my writing is not good enough.
Visting from the IWSG.

Jan Morrison said...

Hi Debra and Rachna - seems this is a common one. I like your inner response to this Debra and will borrow it. Reminds me of being little and fearing I might be brain-damaged but everyone was jollying me along so I'd feel normal!!! Then I'd think that if I could think that it wasn't likely.