Thursday, January 14, 2010

Paramitas continued

Today's paramita is patience. Ah, yes, patience. The purpose of patience is that it overcomes anger for anger and agression is nothing but speed. Anger takes us over and makes everything solid. This morning I sat in meditation really wanting to do a special practice for those in peril in Haiti but my mind was frozen with anger over something to do with my step-son. My patience had run out as they say and when it does - or when I believe it does it leaves me nothing but this big frozen head. Hard to work with. If I'm angry when I'm writing well, I can't that's all. I can't write if I let anger freeze my head. Developing patience is the antidote - breath, give the situation more space - don't confine anger because it is like all of us confined or tamped down - really gets going then. No, give it space, do lots of breathing and counting to ten and remembering that this particular situation won't matter in ten years or even probably in ten days. And be patient with your patience! Be patient with your self as you try and slow everything down. Try and watch your mind as you get angry and see what it is like - notice the loudness and the speed. For those of us who write mysteries and heck for anyone who writes about emotion and people who have them - you have a treasure box to explore - your own mind. When we step beside ourselves even for a moment we can get some wriggle room for our anger to dissipate. Breathe and slow down and observe. Now I must get out the door and go to work! But not too fast.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I totally agree AND I think that you can write even when patience has flown the coop, usurped by anger. You write the anger. It's another way of defusing it. Not particularly readable writing but it serves a purpose, the anger-letting purpose.

Love you Jannie, c.

Elspeth Antonelli said...

Patience has always been a hard lesson for me. When I want something I want it NOW. I understand what you're saying about using the anger and pouring that emotion into the writing. Something to try. It could be dangerous, but I'll give it a whirl.

Elspeth

Elizabeth Bradley said...

I direct all my sadness and ager into my writing. It saves me.

Jan Morrison said...

Dear C. - yep, I certainly can do that - but not the immediate anger, more like the underneath simmering stew of resentment etc...
Elspeth - moi ausi - patience is the hardest of the virtues for me. So good for me to think about it.
Elizabeth - I too write for my life! It saved me as a child when I would pour my emotions into my journals and it saves me now by letting me in on what I think - weird but true!