Saturday, February 21, 2009

night and day


oh dear...it is Saturday - I will be at a cast call for the play I'm directing - Anyone of Us -this June. And I am not up and chipper. I'm tired because dear reader - I didn't sleep last night! So many nights I don't sleep. If I'm not going to fall immediately to sleep then before (and this is very important) before I get out of my mind upset with the snore machine and imagine sticking things in his dear eyeballs - I must get out of bed - and at this point he wakes and says something like "mfwha?" which I take to mean "you're leaving me here alone in the good bed and going downstairs to sleep alone in the basement when I love you so much and feel so bad but oh...I appear to be asleep again?..." And if I have gone BEFORE I get upset (homicidal actually) then I might read a bit or sometimes I'll even have hot chocolate and a wee snack so that I feel like I'm actually quite a LUCKY gal getting to read my novel and so on, then I'll drift off to sleep. BUT if I wait too long wanting to stay in the nice cozy bed with the man I waited fifty years to find and trying to fall asleep in the mere moments between earth shaking snores but being jerked into consciousness again and again until I am ...well crazed...then I cannot go to sleep downstairs but read and turn off the light and then wake again and again in bad dreams and dark imaginings (thank you Susanne!) and try reading and so on until the light comes up and I hear my dearest one making coffee and cleaning up the kitchen. And it is an entirely different experience.


Talk to you all later.

4 comments:

Jude said...

Where is the play happening? What is it about?
Play loud music on your radio coming home - and chew gum!
I'm sorry you're sleep deprived.
Enjoy the sunshine, or whatever you're having (here the day is bright and full of shadows).
Love you.

labanan said...

The play was written in collaboration with fifty women in the states who have been or are still in prison. It was put together by Eve Ensler (The Vagina Monologues) and it will be put on here as part of the Until The Violence Stops Festival - which will be the first time this festival has been out of the states. I am directing one of three plays. It is REALLY dark and I have mixed feelings but one very good thing is that Sue Goyette and I are trying to do writing as healing workshops at Nova, the women's prison in Truro and we should come up with two more monologues to add to Anyone of Us.
It is somewhat sunny here. No it's not. Yes it is. Like that.
Love you too!!!!!!!!!!

Molly said...

Boiling and roiling in bed. Hmmm, I can do that without anyone snoring next to me. Fly on an airplane, read Sky Mall and find all the nifty gadgets people are sticking in or breathing into, to worsen the blow hard. All for the low low price none of us can afford.

You have a longer couch than mine, I think.

More soon schweetie pie! Your blog is beutyful, such a good way to wind all your talents together.

labanan said...

Thanks Moll! yep - we have a bed in the far downstairs - not nearly as comfy as the one in our bedroom though. The snoring is a problem but it isn't the main problem - fretting is the main problem but snoring is unbearable on top of fretting...