Today, in a valiant effort of will, I took the dog for a short walk. We walked down the road and into the marina. There I saw a very lovely yacht standing amongst her peers, her tell-tales shivering in the breeze. She was for sale - a sad story for someone I thought and her name was Illusion. I wandered farther with Hoagy back up towards home and around the ruins of the former rope factory. I thought what a large and lovely spot it might make for an artists' retreat - a modest Banff-east perhaps. I also imagined a job for myself at my former work - CEED - a job that I created that would allow me to do what I do best and have health benefits - a natural thought coming after the week's illness. All of these thoughts I abandoned upon entering the house. I then went on to cleaning up my in-box and making weekend plans to catch-up on work and maybe even play. I read some blogs I've been following and then I thought hmmm...best write my own and then maybe sit and then maybe write on my novel and so on... plans upon plans. I turned over a Lojong card for inspiration. It happened to be "In the postmeditation experience, one should become a child of illusion" . Oh, a doubling of the word illusion and as well - yesterday I had read a post on the Sunspace regarding this slogan. It is one of my most favourites but I have not caused myself to look at why. Perhaps merely because it has the word child in it. Yes, I shall become a child - forget about all those adult anxieties...but now I see that it is the parentage which needs to be examined. Be a child OF illusion. What illusion led people to spend money on a yacht and name it illusion? What illusion led an arsonist to destroy a good and decent business? What illusion caused me to start scrambling for purchase on slippery economic ground? The illusion that pain and ice and disaster can be avoided? The illusion that I can avoid them but still remain awake and open for love and soft spring ground and everyday magic while being closed to those other darker elements? Think I'll go sit for awhile lovely readers. I'm only tipping at this one.